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Friday, February 13, 2015

Little envelopes of happiness and a little about kindness

The wise, elegant, Princess Diana once said “Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.”
This week I have have endeavored to spread some joy and encouragement around my high school campus. My blogging hero, Marielle Coppes, from the brilliant blog "Magical Daydream" has inspired me to take action and perform a crafty random act of kindness. I mashed up her anonymous cards with paper cranes, and produced what I am sharing with you today.
I am aware that for adults looking back on their lives, high school appears to be a walk in the park. I get it. We are supported by our parents, given what we need, not paying bills, just deciding what to do with the rest of our lives. I understand where this sage advice comes from. I feel that high school students face more silent, less obvious challenges on a daily basis, that often go unnoticed because their challenges are less dramatic then foreclosing on a house or moving across the country for a job. I do agree that it is the easiest time in our lives, looking back from when we are 80, but what I feel adults forget is that we have not gained that big picture view. All we have to compare high school to is elementary school and junior high/middle school, so, this does feel like the hardest thing we've ever done. That is because this is the most academically and socially challenging thing we have encountered in our young lives. I now present you with a quick (not very quick) dissertation of issues high school kids face, with the hope that maybe you will be a little more understanding of our conundrum.
We will start with the rat race for popularity and acceptance: You have to wear the right clothes, have the right phone, belong to the right fandoms, and be in the right groups to have any level of social standing. Many students feel contradicted in their identity.
Next is the looming thing right in your face, called your future. Do I challenge myself and take all advanced classes? Do I take 3 years of a language for the possibility of getting into a 4 year university as a Freshman? SAT or ACT? Should I get a job? And you see, there are very few clear clear cut answers. We have our lives ahead of us, the whole world open to us, and these little decisions we make now seem monumental. Some of them really are. Many students get overwhelmed and give up, just showing up to school every day, but not trying. Some just flat drop out (1.2 million per year is the US, that is). 
Another struggle is trying to develop and maintain relationships. Remaining on good terms with your parents, keeping their trust, making grades that satisfy them, you get the picture. Making and keeping true friends at school isn’t a walk in the park either. People turn on a dime, leaving their former friends alone and dejected. For girls, feeling pressured to have a boyfriend, or at the very least have a crush, manifests as just another standard to reach. As if high school didn't present enough challenges of it's own, the media offers up their own set of standards, wrecking confidence in teens. Going through life with no self esteem is a sad existence.

So, no, we aren’t pleasing a boss, paying bills, or raising kids, but we have battles too. The projected ‘model student’ is unattainable: To have a great cluster of friends, making amazing grades (while taking advanced classes, of course), to be great at sports, to be playing an instrument, pursuing an extracurricular, and volunteering. It’s all too much pressure. It’s easy to believe that you are failing. I feel like everybody is fighting their own battle. Some people have no one to go to when they need a boost. Everybody needs to know that they are loved. To know that they are enough, they are worthy, and that they are capable of handling whatever is going on in their lives.
My goal is to share that with people. To share with them that they are loved, they are enough, they are worthy, and that they are capable. I have made 17 cards. 17 little envelopes with 17 colorful pieces of paper proclaiming these truths, and 17 little paper cranes thrown in for good measure. Some notes even have a cheesy joke or pun. I’m starting small. 17 people. What half of those people give the crane to a friend, or if they opened the card with a friend? I could reach 25 or 30 people with a moment of happiness, a bright spot in their day. Remember, “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is wasted”- Aesop

This stuff matters, folks. Quick story: About 2 years ago I was at the mall with my mom, and I was walking up a hallway to find the drinking fountain, while a middle aged woman was walking in the opposite direction. I told her that her shirt was really cute, thinking nothing of it. At the opening of the hallway has her husband. My mom overheard the woman tell her husband that a very nice girl complimented her on her shirt, and that it made her really happy. The point is, what we do matters. A smile to a stranger, a quick compliment, holding the door a moment longer, all these actions have implications that can bring a moment of joy to people doing life alongside us, fighting their own battles.
I believe everyone should aspire to make the world a better, brighter place, to make an impact, to pass it on, you know?
Moreover, as a Christian, we are called to love. This is not an optional part of the Christian life. I don’t do these things just because it makes me feel like a better person. I am not powered by a need to fulfill myself. I am fulfilling my calling to love. Remember the phrase "They will know we are Christians by our love"? I believe that whatever you do out of love will make in impact.
I sometimes struggle to relate to people in a meaningful way. It can be difficult to muster up the courage to walk up to a random person and tell them that they are worthy, capable individuals with a bright future ahead, especially when you don’t know them. That’s why I chose to be anonymous. I’m starting anonymous though. This is the first step, a baby step, to encouraging people with basic truths that are easily forgotten. I still care about them, regardless of the fact that I don't know them. My identity isn't central to the message though. I am just vehicle for God's love.

I now challenge you to a duel. A duel of kindness and joy spreading. Please outshine/out do/surpass/ one-up me. Our world will be that much happier if you do.

UPDATE 9/28/15


1 comment:

  1. There is a lot of truth in your words. Sometimes people say that life as a kid was so much easier but I disagree. I think that the fears, challenges and problems were perceived just to be as big. It's only with experience that we can look back and label them small. They weren't. I think it's really cool to see you doing your own kindness mission. The last part of your writing also made me think. On my blog I don't mention very often that I'm a christian, but I hope I will spread God's love and people will see His light shine through my actions :) (oh and I have seen Mamma Mia. I think Abba songs are catchy but the film doesn't make my love list :))

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